Jan. 25th, 2012

mary: ([band] killjoys)
I can't get any of my crappy photos off my stupid phone, but tonight's MCR show in Brisbane was truly one of the best gigs I have ever been to, and absolutely one of the best MCR ones.

At one point Gerard said that it had recently occurred to him that this band was for life, that there was no going back, that it was a life sentence for him and that it was for some of us in the crowd but that was okay, because we were all stuck in the same cell.

And I know it's not true for all of you reading this, that a lot of you have moved on and don't feel much for them anymore. But it's true for me. I'll be thirty years old in a couple of weeks and tonight I realised I don't care, I don't care who I'm supposed to be or what grown up is meant to mean, because this is me and fuck the rest.

You keep eternity; give us the radio.

Today I got dripping, bone-drenched wet in the pouring rain three different times, I climbed over a wooden fence and hiked through a paddock full of cows (all of this still in the pouring rain by the way) to get to a random pub in a middle-of-nowhere suburb two bus rides away from anywhere to watch this stupid band that I love so much.

Their noise and crowds and music make me feel at times when all the rest is numbness.

And I think I wrote the ending of stupid-clusterfuck-sci-fi-novel-that-never-ends in my head while I watched them, and when Gerard howled how wrong we were to think that immortality meant never dying I couldn't help but think of the bit in Cascade when Rose and Dave rise up out of the fire and just

this band

this band keeps bringing me back to myself when I'm lost. They are the light in the dark, the sound in the silence. They remind me that I'm alive and make me feel like I'm not afraid to stay that way.

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mary: A picture of a woman sitting in front of a stained glass window, from Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds (Default)
Isn't moral anarchy kind of the point?

December 2013

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